Just not feeling it!

As I trudge on to my 16th day, I feel..........nothing. Invisible.I wonder, "is this facade really *worth* it"? I am struggling,stop smoking, really struggling and have been all along........but I find it very hard to reach out and ask for help, to admitt I am not the strong person I pretend I am. When others have way more important struggles happening for them, I feel deeply for them, I hope their struggles will end, yet I wallow in my self silently. I am not a good prayer.....I just don't know what to say to Him. I feel foolish! And isn't it selfish to always ask for help? But I do believe in GOD and hope he reads minds,quit smoking, cause I pray up there all the time!Please forgive me for this downer post. It is not a cry for attention, just my way of trying to find reason to continue here. I guess I have again lost that new quit high.